


I've never felt the feelings (that I feel for you)

by breakthesewallsdown



Series: dinahsiren week 2020 [5]
Category: Green Arrow and the Canaries (TV), dinahsiren
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, Fake Dating, First Kiss, Fluff, Green Arrow & The Canaries, Love Confessions, a bit of angst, a bit of jealousy if you squint, dinahsirenweek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:55:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24427603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breakthesewallsdown/pseuds/breakthesewallsdown
Summary: Laurel knows it’s all play-pretend, but she can’t help but enjoy the feel of Dinah in her arms. There’s something that just feels right when Dinah is this close to her, as if it’s supposed to be like this. As if they’re supposed to be together. Laurel subconsciously tightens her grip around Dinah’s waist.“Everything okay?” Laurel asks, looking from Dinah to the guy who’s looking paler every second.orthe one where a guy hits on dinah and laurel goes in for the rescue.
Relationships: Dinah Drake & Earth-2 Laurel Lance, Dinah Drake/Earth-2 Laurel Lance
Series: dinahsiren week 2020 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1758871
Comments: 9
Kudos: 101





	I've never felt the feelings (that I feel for you)

**Author's Note:**

> two dinahsiren fics in one day, who AM I 
> 
> but at least I'm all caught up on Dinahsiren week! Today's prompt was Fake Dating so I gave it my own lil twist as usual. I hope you all enjoy reading these two idiots being in love. 
> 
> this is unbeta'ed and unedited as it always is, because I am me.
> 
> have a good day <3
> 
> • title from Lights Down Low by MAX ft gnash.

It’s a busy night at The Fish Net. 

Laurel shouldn’t be surprised. It’s Friday night after all, plus it’s karaoke night. She can’t say she’s a big fan of the people on stage, but it makes Dinah happy so Laurel thinks she can live with it for a night. 

Dinah’s working the bar, as she usually is on weekends, and Laurel’s just there to make sure nothing goes awry. Also just to make Dinah happy, because she’s been asking for Laurel to just hang out in the bar for once instead of always hiding upstairs in the loft. 

So if it’s to make Dinah smile, Laurel can suffer for a few hours. 

The person currently singing on stage is doing a terrible job and Laurel has to try her best to not let it show on her face. After all she’s just here to get a few drinks and then go upstairs. 

Everyone in the bar seems to be having a good time. People are dancing and drinking and laughing and even singing along with the person who’s currently singing karaoke. Laurel thinks that maybe, if things were different, she could be the one up there singing for Dinah. But not in front of all of these people. 

She meets Dinah’s gaze from across the room and she can feel her heart melting at the smile Dinah sends her. Laurel lifts her glass in acknowledgement, a small smirk ever so present on her face. Dinah playfully rolls her eyes at her before turning towards a guy that’s trying to get her attention. 

Laurel watches her. She still remembers when she first walked into this bar and heard Dinah sing. The first thought that had crossed Laurel’s mind was that Dinah was an actual angel. There’s no way someone could sing that well and just be human. But she was. She is. And Laurel still can’t wrap her head around the fact that Dinah hasn’t kicked her out yet. That Dinah is her friend. 

Because they’re friends now. 

Laurel needs to remind herself of that ever so often. They’re friends and Dinah cares about her and they have a friendship that Laurel wouldn’t trade for the world. When they first met Laurel would’ve never thought she’d care about Dinah this much, years down the line. 

She cares about Dinah more than she lets on, really. 

Friends doesn’t even cover it. 

But she can’t tell her that. Dinah would never give her the time of day, not after everything Laurel has put her through. Fair, she apologized and she thinks Dinah forgave her, but there’s just no coming back from her killing Vinnie. Dinah would never forgive her that much. 

Dinah’s talking to someone, leaning on the bar on her arms. There’s a smile on her face as she looks at the person in front of her. Laurel’s seen him here before. She’s never spoken to him, because something about him puts her off, but she recognizes him. 

Dinah’s smile isn’t reaching her eyes, though, Laurel can tell. There’s a nervous twitch at the corner of her mouth and something about the way she straightens herself when he leans closer doesn’t sit well with her. Before she knows what she’s doing she’s getting up out of her chair and walking over towards where Dinah’s stood behind the bar.

She can vaguely hear the guy making a move on Dinah, telling her how pretty she looks and how she’s such a great singer. And Laurel agrees, because he’s right, but the way he’s saying it makes her cringe. 

Walking behind the bar towards Dinah, she carefully rests her hand on the small of Dinah’s back and leans in closer to her. The guy looks at her, a frown on his face, and he’s about to speak up but Laurel beats him to it. 

She looks at Dinah, who turns her head to look at her in return, and smiles, “Hey, baby. Sorry I took so long.” 

There’s a flicker of confusion in Dinah’s gaze, but then she seems to realizes and automatically melts into Laurel’s touch. When Dinah leans into her, Laurel automatically wraps her arm fully around Dinah’s waist to hold her close. Dinah’s hand comes up to touch Laurel’s on her waist. 

“Hey, my love,” 

Laurel glances at the man in front of them, takes note of the look of confusion on his face and grins, before placing a soft kiss on Dinah’s cheek. Dinah tilts her head towards her and closes her eyes, a soft smile on her face. 

Laurel knows it’s all play-pretend, but she can’t help but enjoy the feel of Dinah in her arms. There’s something that just feels right when Dinah is this close to her, as if it’s supposed to be like this. As if they’re supposed to be together. Laurel subconsciously tightens her grip around Dinah’s waist. 

“Everything okay?” Laurel asks, looking from Dinah to the guy who’s looking paler every second.

Dinah nods, smiling at Laurel. “Yes, baby.”

“Okay, cool,” Laurel says as she pulls Dinah in front of her to rest her chin on her shoulder, so she can stare him right in the eyes. “I wouldn’t want any trouble.” 

She can feel Dinah shiver in her grasp and it satisfies Laurel to no end. She didn’t know she had this sort of effect on Dinah. She loves it. The guy seems to be squirming in his seat, their public displays of affection obviously making him uncomfortable. 

“Thank you, baby,” Dinah says, squeezing Laurel’s arms that are still wrapped around her waist.

The guy seems to have seen enough, because he quickly excuses himself and scrambles away from the bar. Laurel doesn’t move at first, just relishes in the fact that she gets to hold Dinah like this for a bit. She can feel Dinah’s body shake from laughter and can’t help but join in. 

But then Dinah spins around in her grasp, her hands coming to rest on Laurel’s arms and Laurel doesn’t know what to do. Does she remove her arms? Does she take a step back? Does she laugh it off? Admittedly, she’s never really been good at feelings or intimacy, but somehow with Dinah it comes naturally. 

“Thank you,” Dinah says softly. 

Laurel shrugs, feeling stupid all of a sudden. “It’s okay. I could see he was making you uncomfortable.” 

Dinah’s smile widens, just a bit, and she squeezes Laurel’s arms. “That means a lot, Laurel. I mean it.” 

“It’s okay.” Laurel repeats, feeling her hands burn where they’re touching Dinah. “I’m glad I could help.”

“It sucks that they can’t just take a hint, though.” Dinah mutters, finally untangling herself from Laurel. “Like, I made it clear that I wasn’t interested, but he just kept talking.” 

Laurel rolls her eyes at that, because of course he did. Nothing about it all surprises her. She’s just glad that she could save Dinah from having to have to talk to him for much longer. And if she got to be close to Dinah during it, well so be it. 

“Thank you again,” Dinah mutters, squeezing Laurel’s hand before turning back to go to work. 

Laurel hums softly, glancing over towards the other guy to see he’s still watching them. She stays stood behind the bar, close enough to Dinah to give the impression that they’re together, but far enough away to give Dinah space to work. Laurel watches her as she serves people their drinks, throwing Laurel a smile ever so often. 

It’s only when Dinah comes to stand in front of her again, drink in hand, that Laurel feels herself relax. She takes the drink from Dinah and takes a sip, loving the taste of it and how it burns her throat. Dinah always knows how to make her drinks just right. 

Dinah just winks at her before going on with her job. Laurel helps out every now and again, handing Dinah a bottle or helping her wash up. She looks in the direction of where that guy was seated earlier and she can feel anger bubbling up in her chest when she sees he’s still there and he’s still looking at Dinah. 

Dinah seems to notice that Laurel has stopped cleaning glasses, her hands still in the water, because she slides her hands underwater to hold Laurel’s and free the glass from her strong grip. 

“Careful, you might hurt yourself.” She says gently, putting the glass aside and drying her hands. 

Laurel shakes herself out of it and follows her lead, taking the kitchen towel from her. Dinah is looking at her as if she’s trying to decipher her and Laurel feels nervous under her gaze. Dinah always has this way of looking at her that will just make Laurel spill her guts. She shakes her head to herself, smiling at Dinah. 

“It’s nothing,” she says then, putting down the towel, “He’s just still looking at you and it’s annoying me.” 

A soft laugh escapes Dinah’s lips as she looks over Laurel’s shoulder to where he’s seated. There’s a shift in Dinah’s demeanor when she sees him and Laurel hates the way she tenses. But then Dinah looks back at her and she softens and Laurel feels the need to touch her. 

“It’s okay, Laurel, really.” 

“But it’s _not_.” Laurel shoots back, a fire in her voice that shouldn’t be there for just a friend. “It’s fucking not and I’m going to punch him in the face.”

Laurel’s hands unknowingly ball into fists at her sides and Dinah immediately reaches out to grab them. Her thumbs rub small patterns on the backs of Laurel’s hands, calming her down. Laurel doesn’t know what’s coming over her. Just the thought of Dinah being uncomfortable because of a stupid man just makes her so mad. 

“Laurel,” Dinah says, “Look at me.” 

Laurel complies, looking up into Dinah’s eyes and only finding understanding in them. Dinah’s smile is soft and gentle and Laurel swears she’s about to combust on the spot. Dinah’s hands are still soft around her own, making Laurel feel like it all means something more than it probably does. 

“He’s not worth it, okay? Besides, you’re here with me, aren’t you?” 

Laurel nods. There’s nothing else she can do with the way Dinah is looking at her. 

“So that’s all that matters,” Dinah says with a squeeze of Laurel’s hands. 

“Okay.” 

Dinah winks at her then. “You’re cute when you’re protective, though.” 

Laurel feels the blush rise to her cheeks. She doesn’t say anything, just scowls at Dinah, who only laughs harder. Laurel goes to tug her hands out of Dinah’s, but the other woman only tightens her grip as she pulls Laurel into her. Laurel ends up stumbling forward, her body colliding with Dinah, who ends up resting against the counter behind her. Laurel shivers at the look Dinah sends her. 

“Stop messing with me,” Laurel says, voice low and bordering on dangerous. 

Dinah’s smile only seems to grow, “But it’s so much fun.” 

“Fuck off,” Laurel laughs, but she doesn’t make a move to step away from Dinah.

Being this close to her makes her dizzy. She feels like she could just pass out any moment just from being near Dinah, as if her presence is a sedative. Laurel leans into her, their hips nearly pressed together as they stand so close together. Laurel realizes that Dinah should get back to work, but as long as she doesn’t make any attempts to get away from Laurel she herself isn’t going to move either. 

They get pulled out of their bubble by someone clearing their throat behind them. Dinah tenses in front of Laurel and when she turns around to see the same guy as earlier standing there she feels her blood boil. Don’t men take hints? 

“Hey, sorry for bothering,” he starts, making Laurel snort, “I was just wondering if I could talk to you for a second?” 

He’s clearly talking to Dinah and he’s obviously trying to make another move, even though he should be able to tell Dinah was busy, and Laurel is about to jump out of her skin. But then Dinah’s hand is soft on her cheek and she’s guiding Laurel’s eyes to meet hers by tilting her head. 

“I got this, baby.” She says, the pet name coming out loud enough for the guy to hear, and then she whispers, “Let me deal with him? Please?” 

Laurel honest to God pouts and it doesn’t fail to make Dinah smile. She squints her eyes at Laurel and it’s enough to ease her worries. 

“Okay,” Laurel mutters, “I’m gonna go pee, but if he’s still here when I get back I will punch him.” 

“Permission granted.” Dinah says gently, her hand still on Laurel’s cheek. 

Laurel leans into the touch for a second, forgetting they’re only pretending to throw this guy off his game. Her grip tightens just for a second on Dinah’s waist and a thought pops up in her head as she looks at Dinah. It might be enough to make things easier for Dinah. 

“I’ll see you in a minute, baby,” Laurel says loudly, before leaning in and kissing Dinah. 

Dinah’s surprised at first, Laurel can tell by the way her body shifts, but then the hand on Laurel’s cheek moves to her hair and Dinah pulls her closer as she kisses her back. Laurel’s fingers dig into Dinah’s skin as she kisses her, as she tries to convey as many of her feelings as possible through the kiss, and Dinah completely melts against her. She feels soft under Laurel’s touch and she wishes she could kiss Dinah forever. For real. 

It’s then that she reminds herself that this isn’t real. It’s just for now, just to help Dinah. Realizing she shouldn’t have taken it this far, Laurel pulls back. She schools her expression into one of indifference, a small smirk on her face as she takes note of Dinah’s flushed cheeks. With a small nod she spins on her heel and walks towards the bathroom. 

She can’t believe she just did that. 

She really stood there and kissed Dinah. Okay, maybe it was to make a point, but she also did it because she wanted to. She didn’t have to kiss her. She could've just left it at that and let Dinah deal with the guy as she said she’d do. It’s honestly just none of Laurel’s business anyway, right? 

Laurel just stares at herself in the mirror and sighs. She can’t believe she fucked up this badly. Dinah is never going to look at her the same. Things are going to be different and awkward and Laurel hates herself for screwing it all up. 

Her mind’s racing, going miles an hour just thinking about how she can never look Dinah in the eye again. If she could’ve only just kept her feelings in check long enough to get out of there. But Dinah looked so beautiful and she was being so affectionate and Laurel couldn’t help herself. 

And, yes, Dinah did kiss her back, but maybe that was just an in the moment kind of thing. Maybe she just really wanted to sell it to the guy. It didn’t mean anything and the sooner Laurel realizes that the sooner she’ll be able to move on. 

As she walks out of the bathroom, her eyes quickly scan the room. There’s no sign of the guy anywhere anymore and when she looks at Dinah she’s relieved to see that she’s just gone back to work. She doesn’t look upset, she doesn’t look angry. She just looks beautifully calm as always. 

Dinah glances around the room, as if she’s looking for someone, and Laurel quickly dodges out of view. 

She doesn’t think she can see Dinah right now. Not after that kiss. She’s not ready to face her feelings and she’s definitely not ready to confess them to Dinah. Laurel realizes she’s probably overdramatic and things are probably not as out of hand as they seem, but she can’t help the panic she feels inside her chest. 

So when Dinah focuses back on her work, Laurel slips out of the room and heads for the elevator. She needs some time to think. 

**

Laurel is sitting near the glass windows when the doors of the elevator opens. 

She has no idea how much time has went by, but looking at the placement of the moon she can tell they’re well into the night by now. Her back hurts from sitting in the same position for so long, but her mind feels lighter. There’s something about sitting here, staring at the moon, that feels freeing. 

Nothing much has changed since she came upstairs, though. Laurel still feels like she fucked up and she’s not ready to face Dinah. She just hopes that Dinah won’t mention it, that maybe they can just pretend like none of it ever happened. 

“Hey,” 

Dinah’s voice is soft when she speaks. She walks over towards where Laurel is sitting and touches her knee that’s been pulled towards her chest as she sits down next to Laurel. Her hand lingers on her leg and Laurel hastily puts it down to give Dinah more space. 

“Hi,” Laurel says, not averting her gaze from outside. 

“You didn’t come back,” Dinah remarks. It doesn’t sound like an accusation, just an observation. 

Laurel shrugs. “I saw that he was gone so I figured I wasn’t needed anymore.” 

She can see Dinah turn her head to look at her, but she doesn’t have it in her to look back. She keeps her eyes trained on the building on the other side of the street, her hands nervously toying with the hem of her shirt. 

“Is that what this is about?” Dinah asks, nothing but kindness in her voice. Her zen really is creeping Laurel out. 

“What else would it be about?” 

Dinah chuckles dryly before speaking, “I just think it’s funny that you disappeared after you kissed me. That’s all.” 

Laurel feels her blood run cold. She at least would’ve thought she had a few minutes to get her shit together and not for Dinah to call her out as soon as she got here. This isn’t what she was expecting when the evening started. 

“I mean, it got him to fuck off, didn’t it?” 

“It did,” Dinah says, “But me telling him to fuck off would’ve done the same thing.” 

And, well, yes. Dinah’s got a point. Laurel realizes there’s not really anywhere for her to run, so she might as well have this conversation. Even if she doesn’t think she’s ready, even if she doesn’t think Dinah feels the same way. It might be good to get off her chest. So she sighs and turns towards Dinah, meeting her gaze when she does. 

“What do you want me to say, D?” 

Dinah’s lips tug up into a small smile, “I don’t know.” 

And Laurel feels like they’re about to go around in circles if they keep this up. There’s obviously something Dinah wants her to say, but she won’t tell her what it is. And then there’s the thing Laurel desperately needs to say, but she’s not sure Dinah wants to hear it. 

She wishes she was better with feelings. She wishes she wasn’t so fucked up and could just love someone without feeling like her world is about to collapse. Just the thought of being vulnerable makes Laurel feel sick to her stomach. She’s not used to this. She’s never been good at this. She’s never felt like this about anyone. She’s never felt a love this pure and beautiful and terrifying all at the same time. 

“Laurel?” Dinah asks, pulling her back to the present. 

Laurel blinks rapidly as she looks at Dinah. Really looks at Dinah. She’s beautiful, yes, but there’s something about her in the moonlight that makes her look majestic. Her hair’s pulled back from her face and maybe she does look a bit tired, but the smile on her face is blinding. Laurel wants to kiss her again. 

“I’m sorry,” is all Laurel can think of saying. 

Dinah frowns, “For what?” 

With a shrug of her shoulders, Laurel thinks that’s it. She doesn’t know what else to say. She’s sorry for kissing Dinah, she’s sorry for being in love with her. She’s sorry for messing up her life and she’s especially sorry for hurting her. But she can’t tell her that. Not really. Not in those words. 

“I don’t know.” Laurel repeats Dinah’s earlier words. She thinks they mean the same. 

“You don’t have to be sorry. For anything.” Dinah tells her reassuringly, “And I’m really grateful for what you did. You didn’t have to do that.” 

“I know. I wanted to.” Laurel admits, the next words leaving a bad taste in her mouth as she says them, “That’s what friends are for, right?” 

She makes the mistake of looking at Dinah, because she’s looking at Laurel like she’s crazy. That same soft smile is still on her face and Laurel feels like she’s going insane. She doesn’t know how Dinah can be this calm and collected, when she feels like she’s about to jump out of her skin. 

And the only thing Dinah says is, “Friends?” 

Laurel stays quiet, averts her gaze from Dinah’s. She looks away, back outside, her hands still awkwardly tugging at loose strings on her shirt. She’s actually quite certain that it’s one of Dinah’s, because it’s too big on her and it seems like something Dinah would wear. Laurel doesn’t remember why she decided to wear this one. 

“Friends don’t look at each other like that, Laurel,” Dinah says, her voice almost as quiet as a whisper, leaning closer so she can reach out and stop Laurel’s hands from toying with the loose fabrics. “And friends don’t avoid each other like this after they’ve kissed if it was just to make a point to some weird guy they’re never going to see again.” 

“So what do you want me to _say_?” Laurel asks, desperate for Dinah to just put her out of her misery. 

Dinah’s so close again and it’s all Laurel can think about. It’s making her nervous- more nervous than she’s ever been around her. Her heart’s beating erratically in her chest and she’s too scared to look at her. She feels like an absolute idiot. Dinah’s hand feels soft on hers, as it always does, and Laurel just wishes this could all be over. 

“I don’t want you to say anything,” Dinah says. 

The hand that was previously on both of Laurel’s reaches up to cup her cheek and turn her head, making Laurel look at her. Her eyes are wide and she probably looks like a deer caught in headlights, but Dinah is looking at her as if she means the world to her and Laurel doesn’t know what to do. Her hands are still in her lap, Dinah’s hand on her cheeks just like it was a few hours before. 

And then Dinah pulls Laurel closer, now cupping her face with both her hands, and she kisses her. It’s softer than it was downstairs, but there’s so much feeling poured into it that Laurel feels it deep in her bones. Her hands automatically reach for Dinah, to hold her close, to touch her in any way she can, and land on her arms. She can feel Dinah smile against her lips and all it does is make Laurel’s heart skip in her chest. 

Dinah kisses her, softly, gently, lovingly. And Laurel kisses her back. Because she’s in love and Dinah is kissing her and it doesn’t feel like they’re pretending anymore. But still, she has to know for sure. So she pulls back, taking a deep breath as she does. 

“What- What are you doing?” 

Dinah rests their foreheads together, her hands dropping from Laurel’s face to her neck, keeping her in place. Laurel relishes in the feeling. She could probably get used to this, if Dinah would let her. If that’s something she wanted, too. 

“I’m kissing you.” Dinah deadpans. 

Laurel rolls her eyes, “I hate you.” 

“You don’t.” 

“I really don’t.” 

Dinah’s smile widens and she just leans in to press another kiss to Laurel’s lips. “You like me.” 

Laurel laughs then, her worries long forgotten. “Don’t push it.” 

“You like me enough to want to kiss me.” Dinah says, voice dropping to a low whisper. It’s incredibly hot. 

“Fair point.” Laurel admits. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a long time.” 

“So why didn’t you?” 

Laurel pulls back, her hands dropping from where they were touching Dinah. Dinah seems a bit taken aback by the sudden space between them, but she follows Laurel’s lead and lets her hands drop. Laurel immediately goes to grab one of them and tangles their fingers together. Dinah squeezes her hand softly. 

“I just didn’t think you’d want me to.” Laurel says. “We’ve been through a lot and I just thought that maybe friendship was all there was in store for us.” 

Dinah sighs, her breath hitting Laurel’s face, “Hey, look at me?” 

Laurel swallows heavily but looks at Dinah either way. She’s surprised to only find love in the other woman’s gaze. Her heart grows in size the longer she looks at Dinah. 

“We’ve both done questionable things,” Dinah starts, “and we’ve both hurt each other a lot. But we’ve grown from that, right? And now we’re here. And I’m in love with you.” 

Laurel’s eyes widen, not having expected this in the slightest. Fair, she’d figured Dinah likes her, but she didn’t think Dinah’s feelings were this deep-rooted. At all. The shock must be visible on her face, because Dinah laughs softly. 

“You’re adorable, you know that?” Dinah asks. 

“I’m not. I could kill you if I wanted to.” 

And Dinah just laughs, “But you don’t want to.” 

Laurel hates that she’s right. But she also loves it. She just really loves Dinah. So she pulls Dinah towards her by her shirt and kisses her, because she can. Because Dinah loves her, too.

**Author's Note:**

> hope y'all liked it (: 
> 
> leave a comment/kudo if you feel like it. 
> 
> make sure to care of yourself <3


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